Hope4Cancer: Day Eleven: Beyond My Fear
The hyperbaric oxygen chamber was another new experience. This is where you enter a high-pressure oxygen environment for your body to absorb enriched oxygen through your lungs and skin, resulting in improved overall health and well-being.
The tank seemed super-small. But the physical therapists who greeted us were so loving and supportive. They gave us each a blanket and pillow and really went out of their way to make us comfortable.
I hadn’t known what to expect, so I didn’t have time to get anxious in advance, but when they zipped up the bag…well, as a nurse, it felt like a body bag, so my apprehension grew.
However, despite being a small space, there was light—about the size of your hands, and after entering, I focused on this light and began praying and slowing my heart by practicing breathing.
In addition to the oxygen inside the chamber, we also received oxygen through a mask. I started visualizing the oxygen coming in through my nose as little hero molecules giving love. That, paired with the love I was receiving from Flor, the therapist, caused a release. It was like I was breathing oxygen I had never experienced before, and time stood still. I sensed being held by my Mom and nurtured by her love. I was in a state of peace, understanding that we are all eternal beings.
This state of suspension made the one hour of treatment pass in a minute. And when they unzipped the bag, I emerged through an overwhelming veil of peace with the realization that at any given moment, we are all connected. These nurses, doctors, my fellow warriors, me…whatever the earthly outcome is, we were and are forever connected. What a glorious community to be a part of.
This experience was life-changing: I had to let go of fear to allow love in.
And as an added benefit, if I ever want to relive this moment—like Wordsworth’s “spots of time” embodied in his host of golden daffodils—all I have to do is closed my eyes, and I can feel the full sensations of love traveling through me, around me, and holding me.
